This post is as long as a wet weekend ... in Helensburgh

The Maroons and Whites are washed out again this weekend. The games have been rescheduled for July 26.
So, what are we going to do this weekend? In honour of Hog10, who came along and sprinkled a little stardust on our lives this week, I present the top 10 things for a Coledale nerd to do on a wet weekend.

10. Join yourself up to Twitter. Within hours you will have a couple of dozen followers waiting on your every move. You have 140 characters to tell the world your innermost dreams and fears. While there you can join the debate on Triple Js #hottest100 - too indy or not indy enough.
Or #MichaelJackson, genius or paedo.
(follow me @toneharper)
Sample quote: "OMG, raining in Gong again. No footy. Totally sux."
web: https://twitter.com/

9. Spend an hour or two on the MasterChef website. Check out the recipe for tarte tatin, and debate the relative merits of the contestants in the forum.
Sample quote: "OMG, can you believe Andres' thought there was curry powder in the Sri Lankan curry? Deadbeat just had to go."
web: www.masterchef.com.au/

8. Take the lead of Fergus R and start building your fantasy premier league team, albeit six weeks or so from kick off. You have a strict budget to buy a premier league squad who score points for their on field performances. Weekly transfers keep the game interesting for your footy loving nerd. Gus was a valiant second in his chosen league last season. (They don't call it Harper League for nuttin.)
The FR XI starting for 2009-10 is allegedly
Torres Robino
Lampard barry Ireland Valencia
Vidic Ferdinand terry lescott
VDS

Sample quote: "OMG, just too good again TH10, well played."
web: http://fantasy.premierleague.com/

7. Join up to Trip Advisor. Become an expert on your chosen region and help tourists from the US plan and enjoy their trips downunder.
Sample quote: "OMG, If you are coming to Sydney you can give the bridge and opera house a miss. I totally believe that a visit to Helensburgh pool is much better value and will live longer in the memories. They have some excellent accommodation in the pub on Walker Street and the locals are among the friendliest in the world."
Web: http://www.tripadvisor.com/

6. Buy the Weekend Australian. Read only the Review section, starting with the art column on the back, moving to the poetry and then the book reviews of recent academic texts. You could choose the Spectrum section of the Herald but the advantagee of the Australian is: the sports section is so diabolical you won't be tempted to read it instead.
Sample quote: "OMG, one of the peculiar things about being an astronomer is that you receive, from time to time, monographs on topics such as "a new theory of the electric universe", or "Einstein was wrong", or "the moon landings were a hoax"."
web: http://www.theaustralian.com.au/

5. Challenge your amigos to a game of online scrabble. Once called Scrabulous, this email form of the greatest board game of them all was rebadged and rejigged as lexulous following a legal withchunt from toy giant Hasbro. Show off your word power but watch out for etiquette. Word searching allows you to come up with some doozies so make sure you establish your ground rules.
Sample quote: "OMG, How the f%^* is qat a word?"
web: http://www.lexulous.com/

4: Watch the Ashes via text updates rather than TV. Log into the Guardian UK's coverage of the Ashes. You get a journalist's impression of play along with much ritual stereotyping of we Australians and some typically dull "banter" by the "to and froms".
Sample quote: "OMG, Siddle a pantomime villain?" asks Billy Benros, "He is quite scary. By far the ugliest teeth in international cricket. It might be a deliberate attempt to put off the opposition."
web: http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2009/jul/09/ashes-england-australia-the-spin

3. Check out the snow cams at whichever overpriced resort you will be spending your time in this holiday season. Hit the refresh button every 10 minutes or so and see if you can spot any spectacular stacks. If you are checking out Thredbo it's interesting to see if any actual snow falls there.
Sample quote: "OMG, this year I wanted to spend a fortnight living it up in Helensburgh but the bloody missus has insisted on skiing again. Sure, the kids love it, but they prefer learning new swear words at the Burgh skate ramp."
web: http://ski.com.au/snowcams/australia/nsw/thredbo/index.html

2. Visit the Australian museum. Did you know that the tawny frogmouth is not an owl? Or that Willem Janzoon was the first European to discover mainland Australia? Or that penguins live in the south and polar bears the north? Oh, you did?
Sample quote: Dad: "OMG, it says here that these mammoth bones are the only ones ever taken out of Siberia before the Russians put a ban on their removal." Shay: "Dad, how big do you think their poos were?".
web: http://australianmuseum.net.au/media/When-Mammoths-Roamed

1. Visit another football team's website and threaten to smash their (insert your own adjective here, sample "best loved") player next time you meet. Or visit the example included here and engage in warm dialogue with like minded footy fans.
Sample quote: "OMG, You guys are a bunch of nerds."
web: http://www.figtreefc.com/


Have a great weekend guys. Next year I think we all go play basketball instead.